F*ck Off: Things Girls That Love To Swear Will Understand

There’s nothing wrong with a woman who enjoys a good swear word every now and then. Why can guys get away with swearing the fuck out of everything, but us women are supposed to shut the fuck up and not swear. Dickheads. That ain’t fair, bitches. Feminism and all that shizz. Here are just some of the shitload of things us girls who swear will understand:

1) The look of judgement when you swear around someone new.

Mostly followed by “I didn’t know you swore!” Oh yeah, I forgot to put it on my C.V. Sorry about that.

2) People thinking you’re harsh, when you’re really just adding emphasis.

How else will I get my fucking point across?

3) Being told “that’s not very ladylike”.

Well you know what, words don’t belong to any gender and I can say whatever the fuck I want. #feminism

4) Feeling the awful restraint when around children.

Almost every second word that comes out of your mouth is a curse and you basically just sit in silence around them for fear of corrupting their pure, little minds.

5) Your friends getting accidentally offended.

Just because I call you bitch doesn’t mean you ARE a bitch. I mean it in a nice sense. You’re my bitch, bitch.

6) The multiple uses of the word “fuck”.

It can be a verb, adverb, adjective, basically anything you want, the little kinky bitch.

7) How relieved you feel after a good rant.

Filled with swear words, of course. It just makes you feel so much better.

8) Being told to stop swearing.

And proceeding to tell them to fuck off. I can say what I want, shithead.

9) Trying to ease a new friend or boyfriend in gently.

Only throwing in a few shits around the place so they don’t get scared away. Then you hit them with the real you the next time you see them.

10) Getting pissed off when radio stations take out the swear words.

WHAT THE FUCK, it totally isn’t the same now.

11) Wishing your phone didn’t have autocorrect.

You spend half your time correcting it so people will know exactly what you mean, and it’s not ducking.

12) When you leave work after an eight hour shift, with shitty costumers, and the next ten words that come out of your mouth usually begin with F.

It’s too hard to contain FUCKING IDIOT COSTUMERS.

13) Being annoyed when the guy beside you can swear but when you break out the c-word you’re the one that gets stares.

And how, in any world, is that fucking fair?

14) When people don’t swear around you because you’re a girl.

Little do they know that the most offensive swear word originated as a word for vagina, so who’s really the winner here?