21 Irritating Things That Should Be Made 100% Illegal

There are many things out there that can annoy a person more than words could ever express. From slow walkers to loud breathers, it doesn’t take much to really get under the average person’s skin. Here are 21 things that should be made illegal:

1) Excessive PDAs.

Okay, a LITTLE PDA never hurt anyone, right? A kiss here and there is SO cute sometimes. But do I really wanna see you eating the face off your 15-year-old boyfriend with his hand up your shirt? Emmmmmmmm, thanks but I’ll pass.

2) Wearing hot pants in the middle of winter.

Seriously?? How the fuck are you not dying of pneumonia right now?? WHO DOES THAT??

3) Wearing hot pants full stop.

Yep, sorry they’re just nasty. I don’t need to see your arse falling out of your shorts thanks very much Love.

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4) Being rude to waiters/ waitresses/ bar staff.

Being rude to people in general is definitely worthy of a bitch slap. But being rude to people who not only have way too much shit to do, work overtime, and earn minimum wage too? That’s just not cool.

5) Blasting your music on the public transport.

It’s 8 am. I’m desperately trying not to be late to college again. Yes, I’m very hungover and you’re about to eat your iPod if I have to listen to even one more minute of Chris Brown. Consider this your final warning.

6) Walking slowly in front of people.

Oh, I’m stepping on your heels???? Well, if you walked like a normal person we wouldn’t be HAVING this conversation now, would we????? *Glares angrily*

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7) Putting your feet up on the back of my seat.

Whether it’s the cinema, the bus or basically anywhere that has a seat, do NOT put your stinky, sweaty feet on my seat. I will literally slap you. *Growling*

8) Blocking the way when I’m trying to get off the bus.

Literally this is so fucking rude. Screw all of you and bitter old ladies, I’m glaring at you in particular.

9) Phones going off in the cinema.

TURN YOUR DAMN PHONE OFF FOR TWO HOURS. It’s really not that difficult.

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10) Ignorant bus drivers.

When you’re less than five feet away from the bus stop and they “don’t see you” and drive off, leaving you standing in the rain, waiting another 25 minutes for the next one. WHYYYY?

11) Annoying passive-aggressive statuses.

“SOME PEOPLE ARE SOOOO….” *Continues on rant about someone that’s not anyone you know*. Literally there are so many things that have earned you a slap for the following crime. #BitchSlap

12) Passive Agressive notes from your roommates

I KNOW I forgot to do the dishes again, but jeez, balls up and tell it to my face. These crappy little post-it’s all over my door just make me want to set fire to your bedroom. And I will if it continues….

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13) Basically Anyone On Public Transport.

The person who falls asleep on your shoulder. The person loudly screaming down the phone. The person who smells like they recently crawled out of their wheely bin. These are the people who make me question my will to live…

14) Cheese and Onion Crisps.

Please, please for the love of GOD stop eating these in public. They might be delicious and a great hangover food, but they smell like feet and make me want to die.

15) “OMG Let me take a selfie!”

*Cue 5,001 pictures being taken*. Again, please stop. Stop forever.

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16) Loud eaters.

I’m just going to refuse to eat with you ever again unless you learn the valuable and under-appreciated skill that is keeping your mouth shut while you’re chewing something. It’s disgusting and there are people two floors away from you that can hear. Not so sexy.

17) Bad grammar.

Okay, I KNOW it’s kind of harsh being the shit head that corrects someone’s grammar constantly. But seriously, it’s YOUR coat, and YOU’RE being a fucking imbecile by getting it wrong. *Exhale*

18) Man sandals.

So fashion has gone through some WEEIRRDD shit, but never will man sandals be okay to wear in public. Ever. EVER.

Your socks look great with your sandals - Said No one ever.

19) Having six layers of makeup on.

Seriously. That can’t even be good for your skin. If it takes more than 7 makeup wipes to get your foundation off, you need to seriously reconsider whether you’re doing it right or not. (Hint: You’re not.)

20) Crying children.

I would love to approach every parent ever in a supermarket with their howling little offspring and tell them straight to their face to learn to control their child. Instead, you just walk past, gritting your teeth and telling yourself that you’ll never EVER forget to use contraception.

21) Gym w*nkers.

People who have to announce EVERY time they go to the gym? Can I tell you a secret? *Whispers* No one cares.