18 Things Every Over-Thinker Knows To Be True

Being an over-thinker is the bane of your existence. You wish you could be like everyone else and not spend countless hours trying to decide which movie to watch and which room would be cosiest to watch it in. But nay, you have no choice but to endure the evil forces of your brain as it picks apart every scenario minute by minute. Even now you’re thinking “Oh my God, is this list going to sum up everything about me? Am I really an over-thinker? What does this mean for my future?” Well, now it’s time to face the facts. Here are things all over-thinkers will definitely understand:

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1) Every ache or pain in our body is a life-threatening disease.

Oh my God, I have a pain in my stomach and it hasn’t gone away after half an hour and some paracetamol. It’s cancer, it’s definitely cancer. I’m going to die.

2) We never delete texts in case we need to read through them again.

But remember that text you sent me that said…

3) Sometimes, we reread texts and come up with all sorts of hidden meanings behind each word.

So you wish you were here with me but you’re also having a great day. How is that possible? Do you just mean here in spirit? Is it a great day because you’re actually not here with me?

4) Going to sleep takes us an extra long time.

I literally feel like my brain is trying to suss out the fate of the entire globe at this moment, and there is no way in hell I’m getting to sleep before 1am.

5) What does “I’ll see you soon” mean? When is “soon”?

Is “soon” a week’s time? Is it a few days? Should I just decide myself when you want to see me again? What if my “soon” is a month too soon for your “soon”?

6) We think every Tweet is an indirect Tweet about us.

She retweeted that Tweet exactly two hours and thirty-four minutes after texting me. That’s got to be about me. Who else could it be about? Me. It’s obviously directed at me. Why didn’t she just say it to my face? Y’know what, I’m gonna favourite it. HA.

7) Our apologies are nearly always sincere.

Not that I’ve spent 483056319 hours thinking about our fight and analysing every word that was said or anything. It just came to me sporadically that I may have been slightly wrong. So, I’m sorry. There, no biggie.

8) If a situation isn’t complicated enough, we’ll make it more complicated.

No, no it can’t be that straightforward. There’s got to be a twist somewhere. Give me a few minutes and I’ll let you know what it is that we’re missing.

9) We’ve never felt 100% sure about anything in life.

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“Are you 100% sure about this?” No, I fucking am not sure. I was never sure. Why would you even ask if I was sure? You knew I wasn’t sure. You’re such a dick.

10) We’ll always blame ourselves for the failure of a relationship, even if we know we did nothing wrong.

It must’ve been that one time four months ago when I said I was having lasagne for dinner but I actually had a burger and then posted it on Instagram and he saw it. Fml.

11) We think everything is a “sign” or “fate” (but we don’t know what for).

I was literally just thinking about that song and then it came on the radio. IT’S A SIGN. *carries on with daily routine*

12) We have endless conversations with friends about the same topic, but we always arrive at the same conclusion.

Seriously though, if you think about it this way… Yeah, you’re right. It’s the same thing.

13) We rarely post Facebook statuses because someone is bound to gossip about it.

Okay, I’m going to post this but if it doesn’t get at least ten likes in the first hour, I’m taking it down again.

14) The Fear is something we deal with on a daily basis and it has nothing to do with alcohol.

What was I saying to that girl yesterday? Shit, I can’t remember. She’s probably gonna be thinking about it next time she sees me and I have no idea what we were talking about. What if she asks me about it? Fuck fuck fuck.

15) We analyse every song lyric anyone we know posts.

Hmm, I wonder what they mean by that? Maybe it’s about their relationship. Oh my God, maybe he broke up with her. I wonder have my friends seen this. Better send them a quick Snapchat so they’re in the know.

16) We know exactly how many Instagram followers we have and when that number decreases, we go into panic mode.

Who unfollowed me? Why can’t I find out? There should really be an app for this. Was it my last picture? Was it offensive? Was I not funny enough? I’m gonna have to rethink my whole approach to Instagram now. Oh wow, I need to sit down.

17) Planning ahead is a means of staying alive.

How can I get anything done without a plan? It just doesn’t happen.

18) We constantly over-think the fact that we’re over-thinkers.

Is it annoying when I over-think out loud? Should I ask those questions in my head? Why can’t I have a normal brain?