11 Things No One Tells You About Your First Internship

Internships are tough. You’re at the bottom of the ranks, but doing all the hard work. You’re the company’s slave and it’s no secret because us interns are worked to the bone. Here are 11 things no one tells you about your first internship: *Cries*

1) Anyone for tea?

If you decide you’d fancy a cup of tea or coffee, you’re going to end up making the whole office one. By the time your internship is over, you’ll know how many sugars the whole building takes, how many times they like their tea stirred and who’s partial to a cheeky biscuit or two.


2) What to wear?

On your first day you’ll have no idea what to wear. In my experience though, it’s always better to dress to impress instead of looking like a teenage dirtbag BABY.

3) So, you’re the fresh meat?

You’re the newbie and everyone will know. You’ll stand out like a child in a bar at midnight wearing neon. Or something…

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4) Real job, what real job?

Even after all the hard work you’re putting in, it may be sayonara to you because there isn’t even the gentle glimpse of a light burning at the end of the tunnel.

5) Lunchtime politics.

It’ll be just like being back it school. Where do you sit at lunch? Who do you sit with? Most likely by yourself, I’m afraid.


6) It’s like charity work, without the charity.

You’re sweeping the floors, getting coffee, cleaning your bosses desk and doing your actual job, but you’re not getting paid a penny. Excepting donations any day now…

7) When there’s nothing to do but you can’t do nothing.

You’ve checked your emails three times already. Made tea for everyone and you still haven’t been told what to do, but yet you can’t make it look like you’re doing nothing. FFS.

8) You’ll be a personal (slave) assistant.

This was NOT in the job description. But you may become your supervisors personal slave; getting them coffee, doing the filing, cleaning their desk, running to the printer. *Whipping noises*

9) Competition is rife.

The competition to be the best intern will be fierce. So put your elbow pads on and prepare to battle to the death bitches.


10) You will mess up more than once.

At some point you will fuck up so badly you think it’s the end of your internship, but no biggie. You’re too valuable to them to be fired anyway, remember? FLAWLESS.

11) Broke ass bitch.

You have to get to and from this place somehow, so you’re going to need to pay for transport and for that you’ll need money and for that you’re going to need a job that actually pays. So you need to get a part time job too. Stress of life.